Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Early marriage. Kahwin awal.

When you can't sleep, WRITE. It's the next best thing after Facetime-ing with your best friend.

Lately semua orang pun asyik cakap pasal kahwin je. Sana sini, kalau nak tegur orang yang dah lama tak tegur, mungkin kahwin is the best topic. Cakap pasal kahwin, seronok je menyakat orang. We all get geared up. Even I do.

My stand about early marriage, aka kahwin masa belajar has always been - I have nothing against it, tak menolak kalau berlaku kat diri sendiri, tapi mintak jauh lah. Ye, MINTAK JAUH. Kalau boleh memang taknak, tapi kalau jadi jugak, mungkin itu sign daripada Allah. Orang cakap sampai seru (haha). Itu dulu. Sekarang mungkin sedikit lain.

Tapi one thing pasal manusia rakan sebaya ni, kalau cakap pasal kahwin, sikit3 boleh la. Semangat menyakat mengusik, nasik minyak lah, mak bapak mentua lah, hantaran berapa dulang lah, baju kahwin warna apa, buat kat mana, nak ajak siapa. Pendek kata (panjang tak kata apa3), memang semangat. Tapi perasan tak benda3 semangat tu semua pasal MAJLIS perkahwinan. Bukan PERKAHWINAN itu sendiri. Apatah lagi berumah tangga (okay perasaan sangat pelik guna perkataan ni). Quoting a friend, "They see a marriage as a WEDDING, rather than the MARRIAGE itself."

Kalau yang sanggup terima idea tanggungjawab tu okay lah, boleh lagi nak bawak berbincang. Tapi ada yang langsung terus, KAHWIN MASA BELAJAR??? )%TE%@&I%@???. Tanggungjawab besar tu, cari penyakit ke apa? Stigma masyarakat. Dah gatal sangat nak menikah. Tak sabar. Sangap. Muda-muda dah nak menggedik. Alahai Melayu nya kita.

Tapi ada tak orang yang bila ada couple announce that they're in a relationship, terus terlintas, GATAI. Muda-muda lagi dah nak bercinta. Takde kan? Semua pun nak, AWHHH SO SWEEEEET. (coughs)

Paling tak tahan bila orang komen, eh, muda sangat lagi dah nak kahwin. Tak ada pulak yang nak komen, eh, muda sangat lagi dah nak start kumpul dosa ber-couple. (coughs again)

If there's an age labelled as 'too early' to get married, why isn't there an age as too early to 'be in a relationship'?

Pandangan peribadi, strictly personal, if you think you have found the one, and you know you want to spend the rest of your life with that one person, then what's wrong with considering of an early marriage? Kita hanya merancang, tahu. Allah yang menentukan. Tapi kalau memang dalam hati tu takde siapa3 lagi, takpayah nak gelabah sangat lah cari calon segala bagai, just to get married. Enjoy the single unattached life. Selagi perasaan tu masih hak mutlak sendiri dan tak perlu dikongsi.

Peringatan kepada (diri sendiri) yang lupa, sentiasa betulkan niat. Matlamat hidup ini. Belajar tinggi tinggi pergi overseas, kahwin awal, travel keliling dunia, untuk apa? Redha Ilahi. Redha mak bapak. Kalau belajar jauh jauh jadi professor segala bagai, tapi mak bapak kat kampung tak pernah ingat, itukah matlamat? Kalau kahwin pasangan soleh/solehah solat 5 waktu tak pernah tinggal, tapi belajar pun tunggang langgang masa tak terurus, itukah matlamat? Know our priority. First thing first.

Again, personally, I think marriage is not something that we should rush into, if there isn't a need. But it is, if we know deep down our heart that we have found the right one. Bukankah permulaan sebenar sesuatu perhubungan aka couple itu matlamatnya berakhir dengan perkahwinan? 

Marriage. A happy ending for those in relationships, yet a beautiful unknown beginning of a new life. 

What an irony.

Lelaki ini. Doa doakan lah ye.

3 comments:

mr zahid said...

ok.sila kawin.restu aban,setel!

Farzan said...

well written ^_^
n true enough :)
papepn nnt, bila kawen jgn lupa ajk!!! haha
n3...yes...look into priority both in ur decision n actions

butik pengantin said...

Kalau dah jodoh elok diawalkan.
ada rezeki lain yang menunggu nanti