Lifetime companion.
Would you be my lifetime companion?
Well, I want to be more than that, your lifetime companion and in the afterlife, in Jannah, inshaAllah.
It’s easy to picture someone being our lifetime companion if we set aside unexpected very unlikely factors. You grow old together, awwhh, sweet much, no?
But what if one of you ages faster than the other? Are you still willing to stay with them and still be their lifetime companion?
A Moment to Remember, a tear-inducing Korean movie starred by Son Ye-jin and Jung Woo-sung (whoever on Earth they are) is a story of love and loss. A slow and painful loss.
The woman, Su Jin first met Chul Soo by chance over a misunderstanding of a Cola drink. Later, they found themselves in love, but kept it secret due to the differences of their social status.
Few times did Su Jin ask Chul Soo to marry her (yes, it’s the girl asking for the boy) but Chul Soo said no, mostly because he wasn’t sure if he could treat her well, and they wouldn't be happy as she was born rich while he’s just a mere carpenter. But after an incident, they both settled for a marriage.
Honestly I would say they picture a simple and beautiful married life. From a playful couple, Su Jin turned into a very good wife, determined to cater to her husband with all her heart. Same goes to the husband. Everything was picture-perfect, indeed.
Until one day Su Jin was diagnosed with Alzheimer disease and started to show the symptoms. She started to forget things, incidents started to happen. And while her forgetfulness became more and more obvious, there was one time when she called Chul Soo by the name of her ex-lover, which later caused her an overwhelming pang of guilt til she decided to leave her husband, because she couldn’t bear the idea of hurting him.
The direct translation of the movie title from Korean to English is "Eraser in My Head", which explains everything.
Now what would you do if you were the husband? Watching your partner leave would be painful, but staying with her would come with a very high price to pay. Apart from taking care of her medical needs, you would also have to bear the heartbreak if one day she simply asks who you are, and demands on having her ex-lover back, there and then.
And what would you do if you were the wife? You know your husband still has a long way to go, are you going to let yourself drag him down, be the constraint you never wish you’d be? Is your love strong enough to set him free and not burden him? Well, when you love someone, you wouldn’t want them to be hurt, no?
Watching is easy, imagining it as well. But I feel that this movie triggers me to think of some possibilities that might happen beyond our control. Working a relationship is a choice, but this is definitely not within our power. You picture forever with your partner. With an Alzheimer, forever isn’t the most beautiful thing in a relationship.
Would you still be their lifetime companion? Would you still keep the vows you made when you decided to get married? What if you are someone young with full of ambitions and dreams, would you sacrifice all that for the sake of love?
Despite the so-so ending, I would say this movie is a must-watch for those considering a serious relationship with their current partner, especially for doctors. (since it’s Alzheimer-medical-related)
Ouch.
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