The Changer of The Hearts.

July the 3rd. Alhamdulillah.

As much as I would like to think that June is my month, well, I want to believe that July is, too. The homecoming. InshaAllah.

Last night, it struck me that the person we love is basically 72.8% water. Well oh well. This figure doesn't mean much. What I'm trying to say is, they are basically a person. Someone usual. Manusia. Just like us. How come we see them so great so awhsosome so perfect so IRREPLACEABLE?

There was this FB status posted by a friend of mine. He was saying something on rezeki datang dari Tuhan. And hidup mati jodoh pertemuan semua pun ditentukan oleh Allah. (nashid sikit eheh) The point is, whatever we have, they're all granted by Him. He owns everything, and we are just borrowing. No,  I would prefer renting. For we have to pay for whatever we have, which is, by performing ibadah and remembering Him.

So I guess everyone is fine with the idea of renting. When someone you love passed away, you try to console yourself with the phrase "From Allah s/he comes, to Allah s/he returns". No one could deny this. No matter how hurtful it is to lose someone to death, you still have to accept the fact that they are actually not yours, one day they still have to return to their Creator. Allah The Almighty.

But why is it so hard to accept that these people we love are actually not ours in the first place, when it comes to relationship and breakups? We cry hard, we mourn, we lock ourselves in the room trying to figure out what happened. Had s/he found someone else, we wonder a little harder. What happened? Aren't we good enough for them? 

Little did we realize that they belong to Allah, in the first place. Like it or not, they are not ours. All the forever mine, yours truly, well, they are words. Just words. To make life seems prettier and more interesting and beautiful.

And did we realize that these people, the awhsosome people we call sweethearts, are actually human too? Human, we make mistakes. We forget, that's what we do. And we are just plain human. Manusia biasa. We deserve to be cheated, to be wronged, to be hurt. We are made that way, fragile, to have feelings. We all get sick, we all die one die, we are all human. But since the wronger and the wronged are both human, both make mistakes, it also means that we deserve to be forgiven.

Yes I'm in love. Separated by thousands miles apart, no it's not easy. He's everything I am not, and vice versa, which sometimes makes things a little bit harder and difficult than they should be. We don't argue much, we just define things differently, see things differently, and of course finally, interpret things differently. Which often leads to non-coherence of conversation topics. And silent treatments.

I tend to forget that I'm actually renting him. But you know, when things like this happened, when things get hard, I would ponder, look back on what happened. It's my choice to stay. To still be where I'm at. And for him still being there despite the hard times, I thank to Allah.

But if one day Allah says no, who am I to defy? I could consider him as one of the blessings that Allah has given me, and if I'm not thankful enough for that, Allah could take him back any time.

Because Allah is Muqallib al-Qulub - The Changer of the Hearts

(I love to say Dia yang membolak-balikkan hati manusia)

And this doesn't only apply to losing the person we love, as if breaking ups, cheats etc, the same goes to losing to death. If we keep on mourning, being sad over what we lost, when will we learn to appreciate what we have? Even better, how do we appreciate things that we learned from the loss?

"Maka nikmat Tuhan kamu yang manakah yang kamu dustakan?" Ar-Rahman